“I bought a pair of panties and a cucumber to play with while talking with you.”
-regular client who’s into crossdressing
Posted by Vixen as Quote Book at 8:56 PM CST
December 15th, 2007
Honesty
December 14th, 2007
Brrrrrrrrrrrr
During a call tonight:
Client: “What are you wearing right now?”
Real Answer:
head-wool hat
top-turtleneck, long underwear shirt, wool sweater, fleece pullover, wool sweater
hands: fingerless wool gloves
bottom-panties, two pairs of long underwear, velvety pants, heavy wool skirt
feet-wool socks, fleece socks
My answer: “A blue tank top and pink and green panties.”
Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 10:56 PM CST
December 13th, 2007
Sex Worker Solidarity: Audacia Ray
Introduction:
My official third-person whirlwind of a bio is: Audacia Ray is a blogger (WakingVixen.com), video podcast host (LiveGirlReview.com), author (Naked on the Internet), porn director/producer (The Bi Apple), magazine editor ($pread), and erotic art curator (Arena Studios). She is based in New York and can be contacted at dacia[at]wakingvixen[dot]com.
What kind of sex work are you currently doing?
I’m actually retired from sex work and have been for more than two years (wow, crazy). I still work in the sex industry and probably will for life, though now I’ve moved into more management type positions, which I’m trying to do in an ethical way that gives workers a lot of autonomy. I’ve directed/produced a porn film (The Bi Apple) that won a Feminist Porn Award for “Hottest Bi Sex Scene” and I’m starting to work as a manager/phone girl at a dungeon. When I was a worker, I started as a foot fetish worker, moved briefly into escorting, and then spent the vast majority of my work time as a sensual body worker (which I loved). I also did a lot of nude modeling, which includes one hardcore scene (Pyschocandy 4), some alt porn web stuff, and a lot of obscure, low-production value fetish videos including wrestling, trampling, and sleepy fetish stuff.
(As an aside, I know that I’ve just nuanced/complicated what a sex worker is a little bit more by saying that I’m no longer a sex worker now that I work in management – discuss amongst yourselves)
Are you active in sex worker activism? If so, what are you doing?
I’ve been an editor at $pread magazine for the past three years, and I’ve helped to organize countless parties, events, and panels as a result of that work. My activism tends to be of the consciousness raising and cultural variety: I think that producing and publicizing culture made by sex workers is extremely valuable. Visibility on our own terms and the ability to uses our voices (and other mediums of expression) are key to the progress of sex worker’s rights. It’s very important not just for us to talk to one another and share our thoughts and experiences, but also for people who are not sex workers to engage with our culture and see us for what we are – people who are trying to gain better working conditions and understanding.
What do you think is the best way to promote solidarity with fellow sex workers?
I think that at the very basic level, sex workers need to communicate with each other both inside and outside of their work places. This can happen through casual conversation (and bitch sessions, no one understands like another sex worker!), support groups (social ones, not necessarily activism), art (like the traveling Sex Workers Art Show and $pread’s annual Sex Worker Visions), and writing (on blogs, in handmade zines, and –shameless plug- $pread). Incidentally, sex workers who are interested in writing for $pread shouldn’t feel shy about writing to us and pitching ideas – contribute[at]spreadmagazine[dot]org. If you want to write but don’t have a pitch, I’m the person to talk to – I’ll start you off with a review or a news piece.
What project(s) are you working on now?
My big new project of the moment is Live Girl Review (http://livegirlreview.com) - a video blog in which I review all things sex-related: books, movies, sex toys, porn, art, etc. If anyone has stuff they’ve made that they want me to review, or has tips, drop me a line!
I’m also planning to direct and produce some new porn films in 2008 and I’m starting work on my next book. And as always, I’m working on $pread, blogging, developing art shows, and trying to get paid gigs doing what I love.
—
Audacia is right. It is extremely important that we sex workers talk to and educate each other.
I had been a pso for about six months when an opportunity came up for an in person session. While the extra money was certainly exciting, I was a little scared by the idea of meeting a client face to face. What if he became violent? What if I did the session and he threatened to attack me if I didn’t give back the money? Scary scenarios were running through my head and I thought about cancelling on the client.
Then I wised up. I talked to fellow mistresses. They gave me their tips for ensuring a safe session. That first in person (and thankfully all of my in person sessions) was successful and safe. By talking to my sex worker comrades I was given a good education on how to prevent violence in the workplace. It was an invaluable lesson.
If you’re a sex worker and would like to be interviewed (just a few questions, via email) write me at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom
Sex Worker Solidarity Series
Sex Worker Solidarity: Introduction
Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions, Interviews, Sex Workers at 10:34 PM CST
December 12th, 2007
French Erotic Art Exhibit
From Times Online via World Sex News Daily:
Secret archive of erotic art is exposed for the first time
“Tales and pictures of naughty nuns, lustful queens and randy noblemen go on display for the first time today when the French National Library unlocks its secret archive of erotic art.
The show of 350 works, ranging from manuscripts by the Marquis de Sade to early pornographic photography, is causing a stir because the library’s trove of licentious literature – known as L’Enfer (Hell) – has been the stuff of fantasy since the early 19th century.”
(snip)
“Marc Lambron, a novelist, said that a visit to the show, which is closed to visitors under 16, was a lesson for those who believe that good morals dominated the past. “Enter these ancestral grottos and you will gauge the scale of that lie,” he wrote.”
This looks like a great exhibit! And it’s always good to remind people that our ancestors were just as kinky, if not more so, than we are today.
Posted by Vixen as News at 10:40 PM CST
December 11th, 2007
Rubber Maid Service
If you replace the female maid with a sissy maid this gallery illustrates a recent call.
Posted by Vixen as Sexy Sensations at 12:19 PM CST
December 10th, 2007
Sugasm #109
The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #110? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.
This Week’s Picks
Body Image In Art, Porn & Media
“Imposing it upon myself, or accepting that someone else has the right to impose it upon me, is something I can refuse to do.”
The Importance of Getting Tested for Sexually Transmitted Infections
“I am taking care of myself. I wish they would do the same.”
When Natural Doesn’t Feel Natural at All
“I’d kept mine neatly trimmed for so long, then cleanly shaved, that I couldn’t remember what I look like in full and natural form.”
Mr. Sugasm Himself
Pic(k) of the Day
Editor’s Choice
Darkroom Fantasy
See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.
Orchid courtesy of Erotic Garden.
Posted by Vixen as Sugasm at 2:37 PM CST
December 8th, 2007
Sex Worker Solidarity: Introduction
As the Fifth Annual International Day to End Violence Against Sex Workers draws near I’ve been wondering how to mark the event on my blog.
I think one of the key issues is sex worker solidarity. In addition to violence against sex workers, many people judge us, disrespect us and pass laws to harm us. (See Please help with bad TVPRA issue by writing a letter for a recent example) If we do not help each other who will? It’s important for sex workers to support each other across different fields of work. The more we stick together the stronger we become.
In my new series I will be highlighting sex workers from varied backgrounds. What kind of work are they doing? Are they active in sex worker activism? What do they do to promote solidarity with fellow workers? What more do they think should be done?
If you’re a sex worker and would like to be interviewed (just a few questions, via email) write me at radicalvixenatgmaildotcom If you have a blog or some other online project I will highlight it in my post.
Note: Though I’m using the Women On The Rise poster for my Sex Worker Solidarity pic this series is by no means limited to female sex workers. If you’re a male sex worker please get in touch as well.
Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions, Interviews, Sex Workers at 4:49 PM CST
December 6th, 2007
Some Things Are Better Left Unsaid
“I’ve had my ass kicked lately but I haven’t had it spanked in awhile.”
-a new client that wanted to be spanked and then be made to suck my toes
Posted by Vixen as Quote Book at 10:15 PM CST
December 5th, 2007
Boycott Christmas
Since I forgot to post about Buy Nothing Day I thought I’d post about Buy Nothing Christmas.
“From the Christmas Resistance’s site:
You know holiday shopping is offensive and wasteful. You know Christmas “wish lists” and “gift exchanges” degrade the concept of giving. You know Christmas marketing is a scam, benefiting manufacturers, stores, and huge corporations, while driving individuals into debt. You know this annual consumer frenzy wreaks havoc on the environment, filling landfills with useless packaging and discarded gifts.
Yet, every year, you cave in and go shopping.
The relentless onslaught of advertising exerts constant pressure. So do the unified bleatings of herds of shoppers, who call you “Scrooge” if you fail to enthusiastically join their ritual orgy of consumption. Friends and family needle you with gift requests, store windows beckon with shiny colorful packages, the same “classic” holiday jingles are piped constantly through every speaker in town.
How can you resist?
Join the Christmas Resistance Movement!”
Now for full disclosure I do buy some friends Solstice presents. But I keep it to a bare minimum. This year I’m buying presents for two friends and making a present for a third. That’s it. Mr. Radical and I haven’t decided whether to get each other presents. Last year we were moving so skipped the gift giving. We’re thinking of skipping it again this year.
Posted by Vixen as Musings at 11:29 AM CST
December 4th, 2007
Sugasm #108
The best of this week’s blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #109? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you’re all set.
This Week’s Picks
From virgin cocksucker to blowjob queen
” I love to play and tease with my hand and tongue, lightly licking, sometimes using my panties or another soft fabric to run across the shaft.”
Interlopers
“Oh yes, I’ve seen it all before, I know what you’re here for.”
Old Friends
“His cultured voice warm, approving, promising; it makes me wet every time, an uncontrollable Pavlovian response.”
Mr. Sugasm Himself
The Count
Editor’s Choice
Hot and Cold
See also: Fleshbot’s Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.
Kayla Jane courtesy of Pornsaints.
Posted by Vixen as Sugasm at 10:14 AM CST
December 2nd, 2007
Butterfly Chair
A pic from Retro Raunch. I love this type of chair. My grandparents had some and called them butterfly chairs.
Posted by Vixen as Sexy Sensations at 3:57 PM CST
December 1st, 2007
World AIDS Day
From Avert’s site:
“According to UNAIDS estimates, there are now 33.2 million people living with HIV, including 2.5 million children. During 2007 some 2.5 million people became newly infected with the virus. Around half of all people who become infected with HIV do so before they are 25 and are killed by AIDS before they are 35.
Around 95% of people with HIV/AIDS live in developing nations. But HIV today is a threat to men, women and children on all continents around the world.
Started on 1st December 1988, World AIDS Day is not just about raising money, but also about increasing awareness, fighting prejudice and improving education. World AIDS Day is important in reminding people that HIV has not gone away, and that there are many things still to be done.”
Additional information can be found at World AIDS Campaign.
—
I had an uncle die of AIDS. It happened in the early eighties. Back then it was thought to be a “gay disease”. My uncle was gay and there were whispers that his homosexuality was the reason he got sick.
My memories of my uncle are happy ones. I remember visiting his house with my parents. As a little girl I just thought he had a lot of guy friends as roommates. I probably met his lover though I didn’t know it at the time. He traveled a lot, mostly overseas. His tales of Egypt fascinated me as did the foreign coins he would give me when he came back from his many adventures.
I never saw him sick. He was a happy man, always smiling. And then he was gone, sick in the hospital.
With AIDS sadly being so widespread now it’s hard to imagine a time when it was just starting to become a problem. But many people didn’t even know how it was spread. My mother was convinced it was contagious and could be caught like the flu.
She refused my request to see him in the hospital. My aunt brought my niece to see him. My mother was upset by this and I wasn’t allowed to see my aunt or niece for awhile until it was obvious they hadn’t caught “the AIDS”. People didn’t call it HIV back then. I remember hearing adults call it “the AIDS”.
My father went to his brother’s funeral. My mother stayed home with me. She was adamant that I not be allowed to attend. Why I’m not sure. Whether she didn’t want me seeing “those gay men who might have the AIDS” or whether she wanted to shield me from death I can’t say; though I suspect the former.
Years later I took part in an AIDS Walk that was taking place in a major city nearby my hometown. I was in high school and organized a fundraiser with some friends. People sponsored us to participant in the AIDS Walk. The AIDS Quilt was showing there. There were so many quilts laid out on the grass, it seemed like thousands. My little group of friends walked around looking at them. Suddenly I stopped in my tracks-I had just walked by a quilt bearing the first name of my uncle. I stared at it. Could it be his? The quilt was decorated lovingly but offered me little clues. There was an earth on the quilt and other designs alluding to travel. Most of the decorations held no meaning to me. Since I was just a little girl there was so much about my uncle that I never knew. But there was one vital clue. He had an uncommon first name. Decades later I’ve only met one other person that shared his name.
Seeing that rare name on the quilt made me feel that it was his quilt. Someone who cared and loved him made it to honor his life. A lover? Another family member? A friend? I don’t know but I’m thankful that of all the quilts laid out that day that I was fortunate to walk by that one.