Often clients ask what type of man turns me on. After one call where I gave my honest answer I’ve learned it’s best to tailor my response.

I was still a newbie PSO when a guy asked what kind of man attracted me. (short answer-see Eddie Vedder post) Without thinking I told him-broad shoulders, deep voice, long hair, facial hair, in shape but not overly muscular, the type of man that can split wood and fix a car, kinky, intelligent, well read, politically active and independent, the type of person who purposely lives outside of mainstream culture, funny, tattoo’d, eccentric, artistic.

After I was finished my client said “oh” and then was silent for a few minutes. I knew I had said something wrong. Then he said, “that doesn’t describe me at all”. I tried to backpedal and assure him that I’d be attracted to him. But the damage was done-the rest of the call was tepid. Still, I learned a valuable lesson from it.

Now I’m purposely vague about what I find attractive. My new answer-I like a man who’s submissive, kinky and loves to worship a woman. If I know what the client is into I’ll throw his kinks into my answer. It’s like the question is a request for reassurance. They want to know that I’m attracted to them and that if we met in person they’d have a chance with me.

Occasionally clients send me their pictures. I always find this interesting. Can I see the kink hidden in their face? Sometimes I can. Sissies and crossdressers lips have something about them that set off my kinkdar. Maybe it’s because they wear lipstick? I don’t know. It’s especially interesting if the picture is taken in their house. It’s like I get a mini peek into their lives. I had a crossdresser sent me a picture of himself in his bedroom and I saw a picture of myself on his nightstand. That was neat.

A regular once sent me a picture of himself and wanted to talk about it the whole call. Normally, my clients are all ok looking. They may not be attractive to me but they aren’t ugly. Just not my type. This regular was pretty much the opposite of what I like-short crew cut hair, clean shaven, but most importantly he was a preppie. He looked to be at a political gathering so I asked him about it. Sure enough, he was at some young Republicans fundraiser. He wasn’t attractive to me at all.

I knew that telling him I thought he was cute would sound fake as hell so I took another tactic. “I bet a ton of women think you’re attractive. I bet you get hit on all the time,” I told him. He took the bait and ran with it. He told me of the throngs of women that threw themselves at him. But ultimately they didn’t know of his kinky side so he was still a submissive waiting for a mistress. The call went smoothly after that.

I think of it as stroking their ego. I don’t mean that to sound demeaning. We all like our egos stroked. I appreciate it when guys tell me how attractive I am in my photos and when people tell me how pretty my handknit sweaters are. Compliments feel good.

Some of my clients need reassurance that they’re still attractive to women. Part of my job is to tell them they are. If I gave my real answer to what kind of man I’m attracted to it might alienate them and that’s the last thing either of us want.

Sex Work And Honesty Series
Sex Work And Honesty: Being Childfree
Sex Work And Honesty: Being Too Honest
Sex Work And Honesty: When The Truth Hurts
Sex Work And Honesty: Political Opinions
Sex Work And Honesty: Not Owning A TV
Sex Work And Honesty: The Correct Answer
Sex Work And Honesty: Relationship Status
Sex Work And Honesty: Religion

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:51 PM CDT

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I wrote about my original encounter with SC in my post A Shitty Session.

He called me a week later and asked for another session. This was a surprise because he’s my friend J’s client. Wouldn’t he be calling her? I asked if he wanted to do another double. He said he just wanted to see me. Inwardly I groaned.

I do more single session than doubles. But with a client like SC it’s better to have someone else around. I don’t think he’d attack me. And certainly he’s old and frail enough that I’m sure I’d win in a fight. But his roaming hands and boundary pushing were easier to deal with because J was there. As I was mulling all this over in my head, SC demanded a session the next day.

When I say demand that’s just it. SC said-”Meet me tomorrow in (city) at (time).” There was no question. It was a statement on what I “should” do. Normally I like a week’s notice and said so. This didn’t faze him. I’ll double your fee he said dismissively.

Double your fee. That phrase is tricksy. It’s the middle of summer slowdown so of course I said yes. It’d be a pain but I could rearrange my day. But I was also worried. Wouldn’t SC expect more out of the session? I tried to check in with him-”You just want to do a repeat of our last session?” He doesn’t like to be questioned. His answer of “sure, sure” sounded more like a brush off. I wonder if he used to be a manager or something similar. His tone is one of barking orders.

Mr. Radical and I made our plans for the next day. He’d drop me off and wait nearby. We’d do a safe call. I checked in with my sex worker instincts. I didn’t think SC would hurt me. But I had a strong feeling that the roaming hands would be worse and he’s be a major dick with the time.

The next day I was having my morning coffee when SC called. He never says hello or asks how you’re doing. It’s just him telling you what he wants. “I have to cancel. My business trip has moved a day early.” As I was wrapping my head around all this (I’m not a morning person) SC said “I’ll call you next week” and hung up.

What the hell? Did he really have a change in business plans? Did he just not want to fork out the fee? Who knows. He didn’t call back the next week. My friend J hasn’t heard from him either.

I didn’t know whether to feel disappointed or relieved. I suppose a little of both.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 1:30 PM CDT

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A few years ago I wrote about a Great Session I did in person. This year I have a perspective from the other end-I had a shitty in person session. (I’ll call the client Shitty Client.)

The session started off promising. My sex worker friend J pulled me in as a second Mistress. We’ve worked together before so I was looking forward to it. Sessions with another sex worker are typically easier and more fun.

SC is a new client for J. She warned me that he’s rather ADD in his desires and a chain smoker. Neither of those things are a deal killer and both of us felt confident in the session.

We got the hotel that day and dressed up in our respective roles-me as the Mistress and her as the Switch. The plan was that we’d both dominate SC part of the time and then I’d dominate them both.

Minutes before showing up SC calls and asks us to go get ice for him. We were already decked out in our session clothes and told him he could get ice when he got here. He complained about that when he showed up. I didn’t think this a big deal at the time but looking back I see it as a bad beginning. But the session had started.

The reason for the ice? SC had brought some whiskey. A quick look at J told me that she was just as surprised by this as I was. I’ve met with clients that have served wine during the session and was fine with it. But this just felt different. He pulled out a flask and demanded cups.

I suppose I should segway a tad and talk about SC’s demands. He had a style of speaking that was very demanding. Even if he was following orders and playing submissive he’d still demand something of us. Again, not a deal killer but it was just another quirk that ruffled my feathers.

Anyway, SC wanted all of us to drink. I’ll drink some wine during sessions, sure. But hard liquor? That didn’t seem like a good idea. J had a real excuse of no alcohol because of medication. But SC made it clear that the session wasn’t starting until one of us drank with him. J and I exchanged glances. I’d drink some of the whiskey.

There is something special about working with another sex worker. During a session we can send messages to each other through nods, winks, nudges, etc. Throughout this session J and I were “talking” this way.

I practiced safe drinking by grabbing the flask before SC could open it. Pretending to faun over the label I inspected the cap to make sure it hadn’t been opened. The sound of the label breaking was a relief. I poured myself a little bit and poured SC more. He picked it up and poured more alcohol into my glass. J fake joked that the Mistress couldn’t get drunk. SC didn’t take the hint and told us we should smoke and drink together first.

Sometimes I took real sips from my cup, other times I just let the whiskey wet my lips. When SC started urging me to drink faster I just let the whiskey spill down my chin and neck while he wasn’t looking. Another time I strutted around the room to show off my skirt and dumped the alcohol down the sink.

While I was handling the liquor, J was dealing with the smoking. She’s a light smoker; I’m a nonsmoker. She lit up with SC who turned out to be quite the chain smoker. He’d smoke one after the other, lighting the new one with the old. I noticed how J managed to smoke less. She mostly let her cigarette burn in the ashtray. When she did pick it up she inhaled lightly. And every time SC put out his cigarette she’d put out hers, even if it was only half way burned. SC would then light her another. By the end of the session my throat hurt from all the smoke in the room.

After settling into the drinks and cigs SC paid us our fee. “Make sure you count this,” he said as he handed us our fees. It was one of those awkward moments-counting right in front of him would be sort of tacky. It looked like the right amount so we didn’t.

SC kept stalling on starting the kink play. We tried to introduce different activities but he’d complain that we were rushing things. Then while drinking he’d complain that we hadn’t started. “I’ve paid you enough for three weeks,” he told us several times. That was ludicrous but we didn’t point it out. The look on J’s face told me she was thinking the same thing I was-he’s going to dick around with the time.

He had wanted golden showers and lots of them. One good thing about the alcohol was that it filled up my bladder fast. But SC wouldn’t get started. Finally I stood up and said I’m peeing NOW and grabbed a container.

Though he insisted on golden showers he balked at being ordered to drink it. My patience was being tried. Why was he being so difficult!?! Once he sipped the glass of pee though he drank it right up.

Another problem started shortly after the first golden shower. SC had roaming hands. Different sex workers have different boundaries. If you go see a stripper there’s rules on where or if you can touch her. It’s the same with a mistress. SC didn’t respect boundaries at all. Over and over he tried grabbing our breasts and asses. I can’t tell you how many times I redirected his hands but I can tell you it was frustrating. He knew what he was doing too. He’d wait until I was distracted with spanking him to try to grab a handful. Eventually I had J hold his hands while I swatted his ass.

Near the end of the session SC started complaining about the time. Dammit, we were expecting that! He said we had 4 or 5 hours with him. I was still thinking of a rebuttal when J took charge. She dropped all pretense of mistress and spoke in her don’t-fuck-with-me voice. She reviewed the whole deal-the fee, the time, the agreed on play. SC tried to protest and she reviewed it again.

He switched tactics. “Well if you don’t want to stay I guess I’ll be here all alone.” Argh!!! One way to quickly piss off a sex worker is to fuck around on the agreed on deal during the session. I was quietly fuming.

We tried wrapping up, even spinning a “to be continued” fantasy in case he wanted to see us again. SC was having none of it. He just pretended that the session wasn’t ending. Again, J took charge. She matter-of-factly told SC we had to get going and started getting dressed in her normal clothes. I followed her lead and got dressed myself.

SC wasn’t moving. “Maybe I’ll take a nap and you’ll play with me when you get back,” he said. We told him that was fine and even pulled back the covers on the bed. It was our hotel room and we were leaving him in it!

We took all our toys and the room keys and left. As we walked to J’s car she said-Oh my God, never again!” I agreed.

When we got in the car I had a feeling we should count the money. Sure enough SC shorted me $60. Not enough to go back and complain but it was just one more shitty thing for him to do. J picked up the hotel tab for me since I got shorted which was a sweet gesture. Sex worker solidarity baby!

I drove by the hotel later that day to make sure SC had left. He was driving out as I was driving in, though I don’t think he recognized me. Ironically, SC asked for another session shortly after this one. Apparently he had “a great time playing with you girls”. That was a surprise to hear considering his actions during the session conveyed the opposite.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:34 PM CDT

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Sometimes people ask me what call was my worst. I respond with “I once had a call that gave me a nightmare”. (I was sure I had blogged about this before but I just searched my archives and it doesn’t seem like I have.)

I had been a PSO for a few years so had already heard plenty of bizarre things. This client though freaked me out. I’ll call him Worst Caller.

The call started out pretty normal. WC was nice enough and it was a standard sex call. Then he turned it into a kidnap/rape fantasy where we kidnapped a neighbor and kept her in the basement. I don’t like doing rape fantasies but they’re easy enough. Typically the rape victim is the guy I’m talking to and he loves being the slut in the end.

WC then changed the fantasy. He started talking about how he wanted to be violent towards the woman. Suddenly he was describing the most disgusting, violent acts. I don’t want to write the details of it but it sounded like a scene from a horror movie.

This maybe lasted five, ten minutes. But if felt much longer. The creepiness factor was amped up by WC’s cheery voice and his moans. He would tell me some violent detail and then in his chipper voice say “oh yeah” before moaning.

I was stunned into silence. My mouth had dropped open and I just sat frozen in place. “This is not happening,” I kept telling myself. It was just too disturbing. I knew I had to stop the call but I couldn’t find my voice.

He was talking about using knives on different parts of the body when I was finally able to speak. It was more like a squeak. WC said, “Oh. You know, you don’t seem that into this.”

“No I’m not,” I said. My voice sounded hoarse though I hadn’t been screaming.

“Well, why don’t you describe giving me a blowjob so I can get off,” WC said.

In a daze I did just that. It was probably a bad fantasy on my part but I felt extremely uncomfortable. WC came and thanked me in his cheery tone.

After the call I did my notes-writing DO NOT TALK TO AGAIN next to his name.

That night I had trouble falling asleep. The call really troubled me. I had had other extreme fantasies but nothing like this one. Even if I don’t understand the fetish I normally can empathize. Not with WC. His fantasy just sickened me.

The nightmare was a version of his fantasy. I woke up in a panic and the typical night sweats. To calm myself I kept saying “it’s not real” over and over. I got up, washed my face and ate a snack to relax. I managed to fall back asleep but felt like shit the next morning.

I updated WC’s notes with “gave me nightmares”. He was the first client that I decided never to talk to again.

WC didn’t call back and I was glad. For the most part I forgot about him. Occasionally when someone would ask about my worse call I would remember WC. Thankfully I didn’t have any more nightmares.

Three years later WC called me. He has a very distinctive voice and I recognized it. Something about it made me tense. Putting him on hold I looked up his name in my notes. Sure enough it was him.

Though I was disgusted by his fantasy I still thought it was his right to have it. But there was no way I was talking to him again. I picked up the phone and told him that we had talked before; he hadn’t remembered.

When I told him I couldn’t do the call WC asked why. I was vague at first, telling him that I found it upsetting. He persisted though and said we could talk about something else. Finally, I was honest. “You’re fantasy gave me nightmares and I don’t think I can handle talking to you again.”

I wasn’t trying to be a bitch although I’m sure it sounded mean. In a little voice WC said “I’m sorry” and hung up. That’s the last I heard of him.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 10:18 PM CDT

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From Wikipedia:
Urolagnia
“Urolagnia (also urophilia, undinism) is a paraphilia in which sexual excitement is associated with the sight or thought of urine or urination. The term has origins in the Greek Language (from ouron, urine, and lagneia, lust).

Those who enjoy urolagnia may enjoy urinating on another person or persons, or being urinated upon. Some participants may drink the urine; this practice is known as urophagia, though uraphagia refers to the consumption of urine regardless of whether the context is sexual. Urolagnia enthusiasts may participate in urolagnia as part of a domination and submission scene, though not all sexual activity involving urine is so.

These activities are often described with the slang terms golden showers, water sports, or piss play. Urolagnia is sometimes associated with omorashi, though in Western culture, omorashi is typically distinguished from urolagnia, with terms such as bladder desperation or panty wetting.”

I never knew the official term for a golden shower fetish was “Urolagnia”.

I’ve done my share of golden showers during in person sessions. There’s something funny about standing over someone to pee. It’s like I get stage fright and just can’t go. Out in nature I can pee without a moments hesitation. If I’m wearing a skirt and no panties I like to do it standing up to feel buff. But when there’s two eyes staring up at me I have trouble relaxing. To get over this I just I drink a lot of water until I feel bloated. With a very full bladder I get the guy in position and let the floodgates open so to speak. Drinking green tea beforehand is the best way to do it. Years ago a client with a diaper fetish told me it’s a natural diuretic and I’ve used it sometimes during sessions.

Typically I have the guy lie down in a tub so I don’t get piss on the carpet. Usually they like to shower off afterward so this position works well. Most guys like to be pissed on their chest or crotch. Those with a strong fetish like me to aim for their mouth.

In person the fetish is lived out in a matter of minutes. On the phone though it can last awhile. Some piss drinkers are shy about the subject. They’ll want to talk about licking my pussy first. When they emphasize that they love all of my juices I take the hint and introduce golden showers. Then we focus on their real fetish.

All of the Piss Drinkers I’ve talked to have been submissive. For the fantasy I’ll tie PD up and piss all over him, coating his hair, face, chest, cock and balls and even his legs in it. In Erectionland my bladder can hold a lot more urine than in real life. Naturally all of my friends are sexy mistresses who love to come over and help me dominate PD. I’ll describe elaborate mistress parties where PD gets to serve as house toilet.

I’ll place PD under a bondage toilet box. There’s a normal lid on top that his head rests underneath. He’ll lay there for hours waiting for another mistress to come in and release her bladder. To switch it up I’ll release him from the toilet box and have him kneel in the center of the living room. A funnel is put into his mouth and the mistresses take turns pissing into it. This fantasy can easily morph into scat play but that’s a fetish post for another day.

Fetish Fridays
Fetish Fridays: Sploshing
Fetish Fridays: Robot Sex
Fetish Fridays: Humiliation
Fetish Fridays: Glory Holes
Fetish Fridays: Shoe Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Achoo!
Fetish Fridays: Tickle Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Doggy Boy
Fetish Fridays: Smoking Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Latex Love
Fetish Fridays: Furries
Fetish Fridays: Exhibitionism
Fetish Fridays: Chastity
Fetish Fridays: Pony Play
Fetish Fridays: Hirsutism
Fetish Fridays: Sploshing Revisited
Fetish Fridays: Interview With A Sissy
Fetish Fridays: Teabagging
Fetish Fridays: Financial Submission
Fetish Fridays: Kidnapping
Fetish Fridays: Blackmail

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions, Fetish Fridays at 10:20 PM CDT

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A regular called me recently. He’s normally a very easy call but this time wiped me out. He always calls very drunk so I’ll call him Drunk Ass Man for this story.

DAM usually wants to talk about my ass. We talk about that while he mumbles and drinks even more. Every once in a while he’ll call in a bad mood. When he’s in that mood DAM turns into a huge asshole.

During our call I’d be describing my ass and he’d say “you’re a crazy bitch”. At first it took me off guard and I asked what. “You’re a crazy bitch,” DAM would say again. I would gently remind him that he wanted to talk about my ass. Sometimes he’d settle down and turn nice again. But then other times he’d snap “you’re so full of shit”.

I tried staying calm. Arguing with him would get me nowhere. To make myself feel better I surfed online. The call went up and down. DAM would be nice for a few minutes then randomly turn into an asshole.

“You know I’ve paid you a lot of money over the years just to talk to you,” DAM said. “Yes, you have,” I told him. “But that’s how it works. You have to pay to talk to me.”

“You’re a crazy motherfucker you know that,” was DAM’s response.

I had had enough. I asked DAM why he kept insulting me. DAM asked me what I was talking about. I told him that he hadn’t insulted me. But he just had not two minutes before!?! I repeated his motherfucker comment and he denied saying it.

We were getting nowhere so I dropped the subject and went back to the ass worship fantasy. DAM kept randomly insulting me. I called him on it once more but he just denied having said anything.

Finally, I just ignored his insults. He’d call me a “stupid, crazy bitch” and I’d just go “ok, DAM” and kept talking about his fantasy. We went on like that until out of nowhere DAM hung up.

What was up with him? Was he more drunk than normal? I have no idea.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 9:40 PM CDT

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One of my clients likes to remind me of his age every call. “What do you think about fucking a man old enough to be your father?” he often asks me. In honor of that I’ll call him Old Man for this story.

We’re about twenty five years apart in age. I always downplay the age difference and assure him that I prefer older men. OM’s difficulty with accepting his age makes me wonder about myself. How will I react when I’m his age? Will I accept it and age gracefully or will I try to deny it? I like to think I’ll do the former but who can say?

OM loves to give himself an enema while we talk. He describes the whole process-the type of bag, the temperature of the water, the type of nozzle he’s using. He’ll lube up the nozzle and fuck himself with it before opening the valve. I’ll ooh and ahh while he does this. OM will then ask for permission to release the water. As the bag empties into him OM often whimpers. That’s my cue to become stern.

I order him to take all of the enema. “You’ll be caned for every drop of water left in the bag.” Sure it doesn’t quite make sense but it sounds good. OM takes several breaks to stroke his cock.

During these breaks he reminds me of his age. “How does it feel to give an enema to an old man?” he’ll ask. He wants reassurance throughout the call. I tell him younger men can’t take enemas like he can. He likes me to tell him that younger men aren’t as submissive as him. “Older men are so much better to dominate,” I’ll purr.

Most of the time he’s happy with these comments. Sometimes though he’s moody and tries to argue the point. That’s when I bring in my imaginary, eternally nineteen year old, freshman in college friend. She has a fetish for older men and would love to dominate OM with me.

The bag eventually empties into him. After taking all of the water, OM tries to hold it in as long as possible. In the fantasy he has to lick my pussy and make me cum before I give permission for him to release the enema. I give fake moans and then he’s off to the bathroom.

Most enema callers put me on hold when they go to the bathroom to release the water. Not OM. He likes me to hear him expel it. He’ll even hold the phone down to the bowl so I can hear it better. The first time he did this it made me gag. Thank goodness for mute buttons! Now I’m used to his routine and merely turn down my headset so I can barely hear him.

Why does he like me to hear him shit? I have no idea. I murmur words of encouragement during the process. Usually OM jerks off on the toilet. He likes to time his orgasm with expelling the enema. This is pretty common for the fetish I find.

After cumming he again comments on his age. “Not too bad for an old man huh,” he’ll say. I always assure him that he did well.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:53 PM CDT

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Last month an old client called me (OC). We used to talk frequently but I hadn’t heard from him in over two years. He has a very distinctive voice and fantasy routine so I remembered him quickly.

The first call after a long hiatus is always interesting. Will we jump right back to the old fantasy? Will he surprise me with something completely new? Will he tell me the reason for his absence or just pretend that it hasn’t been that long?

OC went right back to his old fantasy. He has depression and tells me of his miserable life. I learned long ago to not offer advice or sympathy. He only wants me to agree that it’s miserable and that he’s a loser. This can go on for hours.

Most clients stick to their fantasies even if it’s been awhile since we’ve talked. Sometimes there will be a new twist but the overall theme will stay the same. Sissies are still sissies but perhaps they’ve taken to wearing stockings. Cock sluts will still fantasize about glory holes but perhaps they finally got the courage to buy a dildo. Every once in awhile I’ll have a client return with a completely new fantasy. It’s rare though.

I enjoy it when clients tell me the reason for their absence. They don’t have to of course but I like it when they give a glimpse into their real lives. I never push for an answer because it could ruin the mood of the call.

OC hadn’t called because he had been taking care of his ailing father. With other clients I would have commented how that was sweet of him to have done so. Not with OC. That was only more “proof” of how miserable his life was.

Relationship and work changes are the most common reasons for absence. One regular of mine frequently disappears when he gets a new girlfriend. The relationship goes along well until he reveals his crossdressing and bisexual side. He calls me shortly after the break up. I’ve tried suggesting that he look for someone kinky but he seems to only be attracted to vanilla women.

One of my regulars, Cum Guzzler, has had many ups and downs since the economy tanked. I’d say he had a risky job; when times were good, the money was good. But in the past year, his job has dried up. He changed gears and is now working in a completely different field. He doesn’t like his new job but he’s the breadwinner of the family. He hadn’t called for a few months and wanted to explain.

Sometimes a client will forgot that we’ve talked before if it’s been a really long time since we last did a call. Often I’ll comment that we’ve talked before. Guys usually like to know I remember them. But if it’s been a few years I don’t remind him. The best scenario is when an old client calls me who has forgotten we’ve talked before. I quickly look him up in my notes as we’re settling into the call. If he’s into the same fantasy it’s like I’m a mind reader. I know exactly what he wants and give him a fantastic call.

The worst scenario is when a client remembers me and I don’t remember him. I’ll look at my notes and nothing will click. I follow along and try to give a good call. If I’m lucky something he says will remind me of our past call. If I’m not lucky I’ll remember who he is a day or two later when it’s too late.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:01 PM CDT

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Tonight a new guy (NG) called. At first he said he wanted to be dominated. After a few minutes he demanded I talk to him for free. I told him no. “I’m gonna make you get on your knees and suck me bitch,” was his response.

“What?” I asked. Usually the guys who want a freebie at least give me a reason.

NG said he wanted to piss me off so I’d dominate him harder. He again asked me for a freebie. I again said no.

“You’re just a stupid fucking whore,” was his response.

I was getting annoyed and that comment sealed it. But I sensed that cursing back wouldn’t do the trick. I tried another tactic.

Keeping my voice calm I said, “Actually I’m not a whore. But some of my friends are so I don’t really see that as an insult.”

There was no immediate response. Then I heard a subdued “oh”. NG hung up after that. Usually with jerks like him it’s best to just curtly end the conversation. But having the final say certainly felt sweet.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:19 PM CST

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A few years ago a friend of me and Mr. Radical’s died after struggling long with an illness. He was a young man-in his late twenties. His wife was a few years younger and their son was in kindergarden at the time. Our friend was so full of life and love and joy. It was heartbreaking to watch his health and body deteriorate. He was beloved by many and the funeral home was packed with friends and family. His widow honored his spirit-though there were tears at the service there was a lot of laughter too.

Afterward, several of us gathered at a friend’s house. As we drank and reminisced more the reality of his death really hit me. Out of habit I had turned on my phone when we got to the house. I was crying when it rang.

I pulled the phone out of my pocket and hesitated. Should I really be answering today? But then I thought the distraction might be nice. I answered and said hello. It was a regular client who normally talks for a couple of hours.

As soon as I realized an easy regular was on the line I decided to take the call. I left the group and went to our friends guest bedroom. (They knew I was a PSO and I had done calls at their place before.)

His fantasy was easy enough-some light humiliation and then some “forced” cocksucking. The call was exactly what I needed-a distraction. I was so upset by the injustice of the universe. Why did such a good person have to die? I needed a break from my reality.

My regular client provided me that break. I jumped right into his fantasy and gave him a great call. I leaned back in the chair, closed my eyes and tried to envision every detail. My sadness was still there. We talked for two hours and I cried for most of it. But the weight of the grief was lightened with the distraction of the call.

He didn’t realize he was giving me compassion. At the end of the call he was excited. “That was great!” he said before hanging up. It was great. I got a break from my grief by visiting another’s fantasy. It was exactly what I needed.

Since that call I’ve often used calls as distractions. When life gets stressful I can hop on a call and take a break from it all. This works great when I’m PMSing and want to strangle those around me for merely breathing the wrong way. It works best with regulars. If I know the guy’s routine I can relax and get into his fantasy. Often the stress relief will feel so strong that I’ll cry. (This is what I alluded to in my Burn Out post.) I’m an easy crier-a good song or movie will make me tear up. I’ve read the Harry Potter series several times but still cry in certain spots every single time.

It’s like a weird meditation. I’ll be leaning back in my chair, silently crying and talking about golden showers. Take your bliss where you can I figure.

The clients give me compassion merely by distracting me. Invariably these calls get great reviews. Clients will often tell me it was our best call together or that no one has ever captured heir fantasy like I have. I’m not quite sure why this is. Perhaps it’s because I’m so focused. In those moments I ignore my thoughts to create a more detailed fantasy for them. By the time we hang up we both feel better, albeit for very different reasons.

Sex Work And Compassion Series
Sex Work And Compassion: Panty Tree
Sex Work and Compassion: Self Hating Client
Sex Work And Compassion: I Show No Compassion
Sex Work And Compassion: Death In A Client’s Family
Sex Work And Compassion: A Call From Baghdad
Sex Work And Compassion: A Client Shows Me Compassion
Sex Work And Compassion: The Angry Family

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:39 PM CST

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A general PSO rule is to never hang up before the client does. You may think the call is over when the guy cums but that’s often not the case. Many of my clients like pillow talk post orgasm.

Recently I had a new client (I’ll just go with HU after the post title) that was turned on by rudeness. He wanted harsh humiliation; I berated him for being an idiot, ugly, a waste of space. My favorite insult for this type of humiliation is to tell them they’re wasting oxygen with each breath of the wretched existence.

I generally don’t like this type of humiliation. Sure it’s easy enough by it always feels generic and cruel for no reason. I certainly don’t mind being cruel but I like the submissive to have done something naughty to deserve it. HU was enjoying humiliation however. He was on by the insults and the call was going smoothly.

Then HU shifted gears. He focused over the control I had over him. Since this was our first call I didn’t have much info on him. I thought we might be going into a blackmail fetish but HU wanted a generalized power fantasy. Easy enough so I shifted focus with him.

Then HU said I was in control of the call. I did what any good PSO would do-I told him we were talking longer. He agreed and we talked more. He then moved on to me ending the call whenever I wanted.

He wanted me to hang up on him as part of the fantasy. I hesitated. What if he didn’t call back? What if the reality of me ending the call before he could cum was a let down? Would he never call back?

I followed my instincts-I threw another “idiot” insult his way and hung up on him mid-moan. He called back right away, panting heavily.

“I can’t believe you did that! You DO own me.” HU sounded almost giddy.

We continued with the humiliation insults while he jerked off.

When he was close to cumming I decided to hang up again. It felt like more of a risk. He hadn’t mentioned me lengthening or ending the call since calling me back. Again, I followed my hunch.

I used my bitchiest tone to tell him “I’m done with you loser”. Then I hung up.

Several minutes went by. My phone wasn’t ringing. Did I misjudge HU’s earlier hints? Several more minutes passed by. I was thinking I’d blown it.

Then my phone rang. HU sounded shaken. “That was the best orgasm I ever had” he gushed. I was relieved that I’d guessed right.

HU and I have talked since that initial call. I’ve hung up on him once more. He likes it but somehow the act doesn’t excite him as much. Perhaps the novelty has worn off? Maybe it was a one time fantasy? His diminished excitement means I’ll hold off hanging up on him again until he starts dropping hints anew.

Nevertheless, that original call taught me to trust my PSO intuition. Though it felt wrong to do at the time, hanging up on HU was exactly what he wanted.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 10:34 PM CST

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This winter I had an awkward session. I met a client for two hours and the whole thing felt…just off. When sessions fall flat time drags on and on. It felt like I was there for four hours, not two.

On the way to the hotel I decided to get a smoothie. It’s good sex worker practice to bring your own drink. The coffee shop was operating in slow motion. The clock was ticking and I had to get back on the road. Why didn’t I just bring some bottled water?! I flipped through a paper and tried to stay calm. The smoothie was delicious but I ended up being ten minutes late.

The client was gracious and didn’t mention my tardiness. I’ll nickname him AS for Awkward Session. AS was already crossdressed. He was a tall man and built like a footballer. In his six inch stilettos he towered over me. I played it cool but honestly that shook me up a bit.

I went to into the bathroom to change into mistress clothes. As I calmed myself I focused on the vibe. Did AS feel weird? Sure he was big but I didn’t feel threatened. This was our first meeting so I had a couple of safe calls planned with Mr. Radical.

Dressing in the bathroom didn’t go as planned. As I pulled out my platform heels one fell to the floor with a loud clunk. AS asked if I was ok. I assured him I was fine but really I was panicking. The toe strap on my heel had just broken! I had only brought one pair. You’d think I’d have learned my lesson from this session. At least I had worn cute heels with my “normal clothes”. I put on the rest of my mistress garb and put back on my two inch heels.

AS asked about the clunking noise. Figuring the truth was the best answer I hid my embarrassment and showed him the broken heel. He was sympathetic.

He was a very polite client. He brought his own toys and was in a chipper mood. Plus there was no inappropriate touching. I had one client that was all about roaming hands. That session was mostly me pushing his hands away from my ass. AS wasn’t like that and I was grateful for it. He had asked for a session of crossdressing, CBT and butt plug play and didn’t try to get any inappropriate extras.

During the session AS made small talk. There’s not anything wrong with that. It’s just that the small talk prevented him from getting into the submissive zone. I kept trying to slip into Mistress/submissive roles but he didn’t pick up on my clues. I spanked him while he chatted about the good deal he got on his heels. It felt like we were chatting on a dinner date while performing BDSM-if that makes sense.

I suppose I could have turned into Bitch Mistress and told him to shut up while I dommed him. But that felt completely wrong to the scene. AS seemed to enjoy chatting while playing. It made me feel awkward but I followed his lead.

He had an inflatable butt plug with him. I waited until we were about 3 /4 into the session. I figured we’d wrap up with that. Things were going along fine. AS was on his hands and knees; I was behind him manipulating the plug. He liked me to inflate and deflate it over and over again. His balls were covered in clothespins.

I decided to pull the clothespins off his balls while I deflated the butt plug. As I turned the valve to deflate the plug, I leaned down to grab a clothespin. Big mistake. I leaned down into a cloud of shit. The plug had released air when it deflated and I had gotten a giant whiff of dirty ass. Biting my lip hard, I forced myself to swallow the gag. My stomach was fluttering. It smelled horrible!

Thankfully AS didn’t notice. I continued pulling off the clothespins. I made sure to hold my head back when deflating the plug.

More awkwardness came when AS announced he couldn’t get an erection. He had been stroking himself on and off since I got there. AS was in panties for most of the session. I hadn’t noticed he wasn’t hard.

I’ve never had a client have erection problems before. He thought the butt plug was distracting him. I deflated it, pulled it out and set it aside. As I was pulling it out another cloud of shit came out of his ass. AS was sitting up on his knees now so I couldn’t bite my lip-he might notice. I bit my tongue hard to fight back the gag. The smell was so strong it made my eyes twitch. Again, I played it cool.

AS tried and tried but his penis was not cooperating. The session had dragged on and on until this moment. Suddenly the clock was moving twice as fast and we only had ten minutes left of the session. Barely any time left and my client had a limp dick!

Inside I was a nervous wreck. Outwardly I pretended I was calm and collected. I had AS suck a dildo while he masturbated. Five minutes were left. How was I going to get out of there gracefully?

AS had his eyes closed. One hand worked the dildo into his mouth, the other his limp dick. My mind was going over exit strategies. Out of nowhere there was a loud noise. I jumped and blurted out “What was that?!”

AS’s cheeks got red and he said “I farted”. I stood there stunned, horrified that I had pointed it out. Silently I thought-I am such a professional. Then he laughed. I relaxed and laughed too. But my laugh was a little too loud and a little too long.

With two minutes left AS announced that his penis wasn’t going to get hard. I took that as an official end of the session and went to change clothes. While changing Mr. Radical called. I had missed my last safe call. He used his code word to ask if I was ok and I used my code word to say I really was.

We chatted for a few minutes. Neither of us mentioned his failed erection. He kept wanting to chat but I couldn’t stay there all day. Finally I just said “well I should get going” and started to turn away. He gave me a hug and I left.

AS contacted me after he got home. He thought the session went great and he’s hoping for another. I had thought I’d lost him as a client. Maybe it wasn’t as awkward as I thought.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:42 PM CST

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Blackmail fantasies are fun calls. These calls are dramatic with lots of plot twists which make the call enjoyable for me.

The call starts out with me just toying with him at first. Blackmailed Man comes to visit for a session. Our playtime quickly turns into an affair. If BM has any extra kinks they’re easily worked into the storyline. His wife never ties him down and fucks him but I do. Or his wife never wears stockings and heels. I wear them every time we meet and make him worship them for hours. Comparisons are frequently made between us. The wife has endless faults while I’m portrayed as a commanding, superior Goddess.

Over time our imaginary affair becomes serious. BM skips out of work early to see me. He lies to his wife about imaginary meetings and appointments to sneak off to my apartment.

My control of him increases. Soon he’s confessing intimate details about his life. But I demand more. He tells me work secrets, bank info, credit card details. Financial submission is often a subplot in blackmail calls.

I demand a tribute every month. If he doesn’t pay up I threaten to tell his wife, his boss, his friends and coworkers. At this point in the call BM is very worked up. I describe how I keep upping the ante. The tributes increase in amount and frequency. Soon I have access to his bank accounts and credit cards. He pays for a high class apartment for me that’s close to his office. I have a car and fat allowance.

When the client is a few breaths from cumming I’ll review the fantasy. If they’ve given me bank account numbers or driver license numbers I’ll read them back to him.

After cumming BM makes me promise to throw away the financial details he just confessed. He nervously asks “You won’t tell my wife will you?” I assure him I won’t. Often he’ll try to convince he’s not really into “all this”. After I assure him again that I’m not really blackmailing he rushes the goodbye and hangs up.

Every few years I’ll get a client who sends me tributes in real life. I have one now. He sends me a money order for a small amount. I think of it as my yarn fund. Now in reality I’m not really blackmailing him. I’m not going to tell his wife, even if he stops sending me tributes. It’s tricky though because I have to pretend that I will rat him out. I’ll send him taunting emails with pictures of him in his wife’s panties. I write, “Remember what evidence I have slave” to tease him.

After he’s sent the tribute he’ll call and we’ll replay his blackmail fantasy. He loves for me to say his full name over and over again. “You own me now Mistress. You’ll never let me go will you?” he’ll say while masturbating. I play along, telling him that he’s my property. He has to do whatever I say or else. I’ll read the return address on the tribute envelope and he cums into the panties. How long will he send me tributes? I have no idea but for now I have some nice tweedy wool courtesy of him.

Fetish Fridays
Fetish Fridays: Sploshing
Fetish Fridays: Robot Sex
Fetish Fridays: Humiliation
Fetish Fridays: Glory Holes
Fetish Fridays: Shoe Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Achoo!
Fetish Fridays: Tickle Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Doggy Boy
Fetish Fridays: Smoking Fetish
Fetish Fridays: Latex Love
Fetish Fridays: Furries
Fetish Fridays: Exhibitionism
Fetish Fridays: Chastity
Fetish Fridays: Pony Play
Fetish Fridays: Hirsutism
Fetish Fridays: Sploshing Revisited
Fetish Fridays: Interview With A Sissy
Fetish Fridays: Teabagging
Fetish Fridays: Financial Submission
Fetish Fridays: Kidnapping

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions, Fetish Fridays at 11:04 PM CST

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Some years I turn off my phone for my birthday. But if I’m having a mellow birthday I’ll leave it on. Today was like that. To celebrate my bday I stayed home and played with yarn all day. It was wonderful. The Fantastic Foot Slut called and we had a nice chat while I knit a sleeve for Mr. Radical’s latest sweater. FFS couldn’t call during the holidays and was so happy I picked up. So was I.

A couple of years ago I connected with a client because of my birthday. The client was a tough regular. I’ll call him Bored Man.

BM always acts like he bored and irritated. He likes me to talk constantly. If I pause to take a sip of water he’ll complain. “Hello? Are you still there?” he’ll say though he has to know I haven’t hung up.

He never seems satisfied with the fantasy. His is an easy fantasy-some crossdressing with a dominance storyline. BM continually edits the fantasy. He doesn’t like to talk much but will change details over and over. I try to tell a good fantasy but he never seems satisfied. At the end of every call I always wonder why he calls me back. He does though so I’m doing something right.

For my birthday that year Mr. Radical and I had celebrated earlier in the day. When evening rolled around I figured I’d turn on my phone. When BM called I was almost tempted to fake an excuse on why I couldn’t talk. Instead I decided to chat.

BM sounded more depressed than his usual bored and annoyed mood. I asked my usual “how are you doing” opener expecting to get his usual nondescript reply.

Instead he told me that it was his birthday. BM added that he was alone so decided to call me. I told him it was my birthday too. “Really?” he asked, sounding hopeful. I told him yes it was.

Usually I don’t tell clients it’s my birthday because it weirds them out. To me it’s just a twenty minute chunk out of my day. But they feel like they’re imposing. With BM, I just had a feeling that I should tell him of our shared birth date.

My hunch paid off. BM was incredibly nice on that call. He forgot his fantasy and just talked about his life. He didn’t spill any deep dark secrets. It was more like I was a friend and he was telling me about his day-small talk with occasional sharing. At the end of the call he thanked me for the first time.

Now when he calls he’s not as annoying. BM still likes me to talk constantly and he still likes to tweak the fantasy details. But he’s polite about it and there’s a warmness in his voice that wasn’t there before the birthday call.

Posted by Vixen as PSO Confessions at 11:03 PM CST

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