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October 12th, 2006

L.A. Trip Part 2- Mismatched Whores

Perfect Match

Sera and I have a pitch for you dear readers. We have a tv show loosely based on us. Inspired by our LA adventures we like to call our series “Mismatched Whores”.

It all started the night Latex Geezer and I picked Sera up for dinner. We headed to a nearby Italian restaurant. LG was not in a good mood because we had just spent hours in LA traffic. He became lost again, got in a near wreck-inches away from a car and snapped at us for attempting to give him directions. We got out and walked to the restaurant leaving him to find a parking spot.

We got a table and ordered a bottle of wine. Though this car trip was short our nerves were still tense. By the time LG came to the table we had already ordered appetizers. To his credit he apologized for his bad temper as he approached the table. His grumbling returned as he sat down for his ass was still sore from his visit with Dr. Feathers.

The waiter returned with our appetizers and gave us what Sera calls the “whore look”. Though we’re not prostitutes we are young women, we’re dressed up pretty, we’re hanging out with a much older man and said older man is obviously paying for everything. Apparently this implies we’re whores.

What does the “whore look” look like? It is a look of disapproval mixed with some snobbery and a twinge of sexual tension. The waiter’s whore look didn’t upset us. On the contrary we were quite amused us. While in the bathroom we hatched our tv show.

Mismatched Whores
Pilot Episode

Sera and I are roommates. We are also Dominatrixes. I’m the Hippy Mistress who dominates New Age style-with chanting, incense, scarves and belly dancing. I dominate to the tunes of Enya and Cocteau Twins, often beating a drum and the clients ass to bring him into an altered state. Sera is the Classy Mistress whose dungeon is decked out with designer wares. She does her sessions in the latest fashions, often sharing a martini with the client beforehand. Her flogger paddles are jewel encrusted and her bondage table is made with the finest leather.

Hilarity ensues by our Odd Couple like living arrangements. I accidentally tie dye one of her designer dresses and nag her to quit smoking while lighting my incense sticks. She uses an incense stand as an ashtray and mistakes my praying mantis goddess figurine as the real insect and throws it outside with a scream.

We live in a large house that affords us each a separate play space. More hilarity ensues when our clients get interchanged. Imagine my gentle New Age client getting tied down to Sera’s table. He screams for me while she tightens his cuffs. By episode’s end I swoon in just as she’s lubing up the 10” dildo.

After we realize he’s really my client I turn to her and say her client is in my dungeon. She asks me how I know. I reply that after casting the sacred circle I took out my recorder to channel his inner submissive. He turned around, got on all fours and pushed his ass against the instrument. We look at each other in confusion and laugh. A hit series is born.

I don’t know if anyone else finds this funny but Sera and I think it’s hilarious. In fact just typing this story is making me laugh.

Posted by Vixen in PSO Confessions

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 12th, 2006 at 11:14 pm and is filed under PSO Confessions. You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

3 Responses to “L.A. Trip Part 2- Mismatched Whores”

  1. Sera says:

    This made me laugh out loud, too! It can’t be just us!

    Did you post this before reading mine? Were we on the same mental page the same day, and just didn’t know it?


  2. Vixen says:

    No! I wrote up mine and went over to your blog to let you know what I wrote. I couldn’t believe that you had written about it too! See, we are mismatched!


  3. The Lizard Queen says:

    I think it sounds amusing. I don’t have cable, but it seems to me that this could be sort of like “Weeds” (or is it “Weed”?) in that it shows the human, nuanced side behind something the average person sees as black and white. Average Joe: “What do you mean there’s more than one kind of whore?”

    On an entirely different subject, as a native southern Californian the idea of 405 at rush hour made me go into convulsions for a minute there. What kind of guy fancies himself a slave but then won’t even so much as take driving directions? Huh.

    I’m enjoying these stories. They take me away from my everyday annoyances and boredoms. Thanks, ladies!

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